A HEARTFELT PLEA TO THE WOMEN OF WASHINGTON DC

You look out of the window, deciding what you're going to wear to work. It's raining, it might even be snowing, you think to yourself "Oh, it's the perfect day to wear my rainboots - practical and fashionable at the same time".

!!! STOP RIGHT THERE !!!

Wellington boots - named after the Duke of Wellington - have become quite the fashion statement, mainly thanks to Kate Moss wearing them at Glastonbury a few years ago. She wore the Hunter. In green. With very short shorts and an attitude that only she is capable of carrying off.

Every which way I turn these days, I see women of all ages, shapes and sizes wearing wellington boots. Also known as rainboots, galoshes, wellies...they originate from England. The fashion pack's most popular make right now is Hunter which is synonymous with the hunting, shooting, fishing brigade (for years the recipients of great mockery and derision from the working class who actually had to work for a living) in England. Usually teamed with the Barbour jacket, the Hunter wellies became a staple of the posh folk's outdoor uniform. Hunter-Barbour folk were spotted in the countryside - alongside horses, pigs, cows, dogs, anything other than human beings really. 

Thanks to the people at Burberry, there are many women who think it's appropriate/trendy/cute to don a pair of wellies in the city.  It's not. If you want just one reason why you should immediately donate your Burberry wellies to Goodwill, google the term Chav.

If you thought the English posh folk got the piss taken out of them, you are in for a treat if you insist on continuing to wear wellies with your Ann Taylor worksuit.

WTF are you thinking?

Wearing the Burberry check, or one of the brightly coloured Hunters, or God forbid the wellies by Coach - you don't look like the models in the J Crew catalogue, you look like a wanker.

If it's snowing, then you might just get away with it, but hold on no, who am I kidding - NOBODY with any fashion intelligence whatsoever wears wellies except when they are traipsing around the countryside, about to get on a horse, fishing, or knee-deep in the garden (note: every activity has to contain mud).

If, however, you are under the age of 13, then you can wear wellies any time you want. Even with your pyjamas.